Our wellbeing should always sit at the top of our priority list, but however much we like our jobs, they can cause us a rollercoaster of emotions.

We spoke to Kate Greenslade, a mindfulness life coach at onlinemindfulnesscoach.com, about how we can build resilience and create healthy habits that are scientifically proven to help reduce stress and anxiety.

The most common things that cause stress and fear

There is a ton of issues which bring about stress and fear, but the main one is worrying about things that haven’t happened yet and probably won’t happen.

There’s fear about the future and what might be around the corner. It’s easy to get caught up in but it’s never nearly as scary as what we make up in our heads.

“My life has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened.”

– Mark Twain

When we’re stressed it can cause us to have a disproportionate emotional response. Recent scientific discoveries have identified this as the amygdala hijack – when our rational mind stops working and we react without thinking in a way that would normally be out of character.

It’s because our ‘fight or flight’ part of the brain has been triggered. Humans would’ve needed this in the past for survival when they lived in the wild but responding like this now,  day to day in work or personal situations, is not serving us.

How can we stop worrying about things that are out of our control?

Another cause of stress and anxiety is obsessing over what we could have done differently. One of the big things that we can do is practise acceptance for things we can’t change.

Use ‘it is what it is’ as a mantra in stressful situations – it can break that loop in your head and help you take that step back.

Let go of resistance – recognise and remember that the more we hold on to something that we don’t have any control over, the worse we will feel. Trust that things normally turn out ok.

Stress only makes us unhappy and unwell and won’t change the outcome.

How can we generate the courage to change things that are in our control?

If you have something like a big presentation coming up that you are nervous about, don’t just prepare your notes and slides, but also do some preparation around how you might feel mentally, what might trigger you emotionally, and how you can let these feelings go.

If you are trying to make a big decision, be clear about your intentions – why do you want to do it?  Don’t work with “shoulds” as they will cause conflict and are not what you actually feel. Focus on your authentic self and trust yourself.

Use your gut instinct and your intuition as opposed to always trying to intellectualise decisions, which can cause worry.

Ask yourself what’s the worst that could happen – and is that likely to happen?

How can mindfulness help?

It helps massively just to know that there is another way to think, behave and feel. In general, people find it difficult to believe that we can adjust the way we think. But neuroscience tells us that the brain is constantly rewiring itself, even down to how we act and use our body. It has plasticity and the more we make the effort to change, the more it will change.

If you’re always negative then that will naturally become the way you think and feel. You need to have the intention to change, repeating similar feelings, thoughts and actions to positively rewire the brain.

Applied mindfulness can help you identify behavioural patterns that you want to alter – first understanding what they are, then learning how to shift those patterns. Regular mindfulness practice increases an inner calm and reduces anxiety.

With it, you will build up resilience by increasing awareness of your own actions, thoughts and emotions.

What healthy habits can we create to promote wellbeing?

Regular meditation really works and so many people are starting to embrace it now with apps like Headspace and Calm. It allows you to build resilience to everyday stresses by creating inner space. If sitting still in silence fills you with dread then you can anchor meditation to something you already do like a daily walk.

Force yourself out of autopilot and notice more of the little things to do with your environment, the people around you and how you behave towards other people – do you really listen and live in the present moment?

Practice being grateful for small things. Notice if someone makes you a cup of tea and enjoy elements of people’s characters that you might not have seen before – it will bring you (and everyone around you) more joy.

If you’d like to reduce your stress and create positive habits in your life, contact Kate Greenslade on 0790 888 9262 or [email protected] for a free introductory session.

The need for personal privacy is a basic instinct, but we are also social creatures and modern technology is exploiting that, Baroness Sharmi Chakrabarti said at conference in November 2018.

The former director of Liberty civil liberties group told delegates at the CIPD conference in Manchester: “There are huge risks when it comes to communicating online and our digital imprint is seriously compromising us.”

Social media and personal privacy is, she said, something that is very tricky for employers to navigate. “It’s an asset but a liability too. I generally advocate more trust and less snooping but employers need to have a conversation with employees about what is and isn’t acceptable.”

Tech providers, such as Facebook and Twitter, also had an ethical responsibility to look after people’s virtual safety and ensure that people weren’t vilified or subjected to online trolling, the barrister said.

Protecting your privacy at work

Paul Bischoff, editor of Comparitech website, said that there are a number of ways employees can compromise their personal privacy, and that of their employer. “Employees who log into social media, shopping websites, and other accounts on office devices might not realise that their activity can be monitored and recorded by their employer, even when those devices are taken off company property,” he notes. “On top of that, accidentally leaving an account logged in or saving your login credentials to a work computer can leave openings for other in the office to invade your privacy.”

Employees should be aware of the lawful extent of employment background checks and at-work surveillance, Bischoff says. “For example, employees are not required under any circumstance to give an employer the passwords to their social media accounts.”

Implementation of a data protection policy

When it comes to implementing a data protection policy, there are four key things which should be considered. “What information is collected, how it’s used, who can access it, and how long it is retained,” Bischoff explains. “The first point is pretty self-explanatory. Employees and customers alike should know their data is being used and the context under which it was collected.

Access should be limited to the minimum number of people possible, and employees need to give opt-in consent for their information to be shared with any third parties. Finally, personal data should have an expiration date. When data reaches the age limit, or when a customer or employee leaves the company, their data should be deleted.”

A network security policy might also be necessary to support the more general privacy policy. “This can include company policies about how to spot and handle phishing emails, what activity is allowed on work devices, limitations on personal devices accessing the network, and disaster recovery plans,” says Bischoff.

Why millennials and Generation Z are most at risk

Tom Tahany, intelligence analyst at Blackstone Consultancy security specialist says millennials (those born between 1981-96) and Generation Z (1997 onwards) are the ones who are most at risk of flouting privacy regulations.

“Journalist Marlo Stern, writing for the Daily Beast, coined the term ‘generation overshare’ to describe how the younger generation posts vast amounts of data online,” he notes. “From sources such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram it is possible to chart enormous sections of an individual’s lives, from where they shop to where they holiday and even discover details about their daily routine.”

Under the revised General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR), which came into force on 25th May 2018, companies must also use ‘appropriate technical and organisational security measures’ to protect the data they collect on employees against accidental loss, disclosure or unauthorised processing.

Sean Potter, content manager at Evoluted digital agency says: “In addition, people will be allowed to request for valid updates to be made to any information held about them at any point.”

Maintaining GDPR for employees

In data terms, your organisation is what’s known as the ‘data controller.’ Potter explains: “This means that the responsibility for compliance is placed firmly at your door. To prove compliance with GDPR, you will need to maintain ongoing records. You’ll also need to put policies in place for governing the collection and use of data.”
Some companies, especially larger organisations, outsource GDPR to as Data Protection Officer (DPO).

“This would provide you with a dedicated employee with extensive GDPR knowledge – and also the time to handle all potential time taken up by the area (removal requests, requests for information held, knowledge shared throughout the company etc.)” Potter says.

“Only you can decide whether a DPO is right for your company. The amount of data you handle may be the deciding factor.”

Since the dawn of the digital age, where emails and social media rule, face to face meetings have taken something of a nose dive.

Those of us who were born before 1981, dubbed ‘digital immigrants’ remember a time when there was no Google or mobiles and you had to pick up the phone or arrange to meet someone in person. It’s probably fair to say that digital natives (loosely categorised as those born after 1981), on the other hand, are more au fait with texting than talking and virtual meetings rather than physical ones.

Loneliness epidemic

Speaking at the CIPD conference in November last year, author and millennial Dan Schwabel, said we were in the midst of a “loneliness epidemic” and that remote working, which was often seen as a major benefit, could potentially leave people feeling isolated.

The Back to Human author said: “Great ideas come from socialising and how people behave is usually different to what they actually want and need. Sending a text or email is easier than speaking to people face to face but social integration is essential to our wellbeing and individual needs.”

Virtual interaction

But can virtual meetings or webinars help bridge the gap in the absence of face to face meetings?

In a word, no, says Jonathan Taylor, senior psychologist at Pearn Kandola business psychology firm. “When I’m coaching someone and there is distance involved, I always insist on doing it through video conference, such as Skype for Business, because it’s so important for us to see each other’s body language and show that you are taking a genuine interest in what people are saying.”

Words matter but not as much as the way we say them, according to Taylor. “There were some famous experiments by psychologist Albert Mehrabian in the 60s and 70s, where he looked at the impact of our communication,” he explains. “His conclusions were that our words do not carry as much impact as we think and that much of the influence of our communication comes from our body language and tone.”

Building relationships

Mehrabian found, for example, that 55% of the impact of our communication came from body language, 38% from the tone of voice, and just 7% from the words themselves.

Face to face interaction is really important when it comes to building trust and rapport with someone and it takes significantly longer to build a relationship when you’re doing it primarily online and have to guess the meaning behind the words, says Taylor.

“In a typical 10 minute conversation, studies show we can give away up to 150 micro-behaviours, which can be positive or negative. When we’re building trust with someone, the ‘micro-affirmations’ that we give away are really important – eye contact, open body language, building on what we hear. Our body language reinforces our words and our intent,” he notes.

Creating a more inclusive environment

One to one meetings and communication is also important when it comes to diversity and inclusion, says Taylor. “Micro-affirmations are a very important part of inclusive leadership – reinforcing your intent to include everyone in discussions. It’s very difficult to demonstrate inclusive leadership in the absence of face to face (or virtual face to face) non-verbal cues.”

Sara Hope, founder of The Conversation Space coaching consultancy, says we should place as much emphasis on conversational skills as we do on data analytics, technology and AI. “Conversation happens at every moment, in every company yet it is often one of the most under-rated and under-developed skills, even though it carries the greatest potential to impact organisational culture, performance, brand and engagement – both positively and negatively,” she notes.

Making yourself vulnerable

We often underestimate the importance of good communication and conversation, says Hope, and the skills it takes to grow trust, build empathy and influence others. “The way we talk to each other, person to person; to our clients and customers and to the other people that we work with in our organisations, sets the tone and cultural norms at a foundational level.”

Business leaders need to try and have more face to face conversations and to speak more candidly and openly, Hope believes. “Leaders need to have more courageous conversations, to show up in person and to show a high degree of humility and willingness to be vulnerable,” she says.

So next time you’re thinking of sending that email, it might be worth picking up the phone and trying to do it over coffee or lunch instead.